Motivated by a glut of murmuring and complaining in my house, and inspired by an article in the latest homeschool newsletter, I have instituted a "zero tolerance for complaining policy". This is how it works....
I spent some time informing the children that complaining is no longer going to be tolerated. Then I laid out the precise consequence that will occur each time a complaint slips from their mouths, or is expressed by their rolling eyes, open-mouthed, silent protest. I will not yell, lecture, or otherwise show any emotion. I will simply walk over to the refrigerator and make a checkmark on a piece of paper with their name on it. Each check mark represents a half hour of extra work of my choosing. Could be chores, could be school work--whatever I deem necessary at the moment. But the point is they lose some free time and I help them work through the bad attitude till they have a good one!
We started off strong on day one-an hour of extra work from one, two and a half hours(!) from another..but I think this is going to be a good tool. And stuff is really getting done around here!
You would think after 13 years of dealing with behavior I would remember to lay down the rules, and communicate clearly the consequences of not following the rules, but I forget. They need to know the boundaries. They need to know the consequences. They need to experience the consequences. I need to consistently enforce the rules. It's all coming back to me like I'm waking up or coming out of a fog.... :>) Must be all the baby hormones running back to wherever they go when I'm not pregnant or nursing!
1 comment:
I have lost touch with some things too Maureen! Why should we accept grumpy complaining? I have worked with grown ups who never learned that lesson. Hope my own do better.
Your song cracks me up. Are you playing that out loud for the kids?
BTW, when ARE we going to get together? I like this blog talk, but I miss you!
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