Where's Emma?

When I travel alone with the children, I often experience a brief moment of panic when the thought occurs to me that I don't remember putting Matthew in his car seat, which causes me to swivel my head to look behind me to make sure he is actually in the car. My children think this is wildly funny and will frequently tease me by frantically crying out, "Where's Matthew?" as we drive down the road. You may think that could not possibly happen, but I know what this sleep deprived brain is incapable of...namely, remembering things very well. Tonight, one of my worst fears came true...I actually left a child behind. Poor Emma! As she says, "How could you forget your only girl?" Thank God it was at the church, where she was supervised by her beloved and gracious :) Aunt Jenn. I actually made it all the way home, shared some coffee with a fellow sleep deprived dear friend, (name withheld to protect the innocent), and had talked with Ken for about 5 minutes before it actually dawned on me that I had gone to church with 2 children and come back with only one!
Yes, I am extremely embarassed.
Yes, you may laugh at me.
Yes, I'm going to bed now.
Good night.

A beautiful day in the neighborhood

Every once in a while I'll have a day, or an afternoon, or an hour, or 5 minutes :>) when things line up and pieces fall into place and all seems right in the world. Yesterday afternoon was just such a time. It started when the little girl next door came to play with Emma. I used to worry about the influence she might have on my little ones, but yesterday I realized our influence on her was what was important, and I have a unique opportunity to help shape her worldview in a way that she may or may not get at home. There was a time, when she first started visiting us, when she would run away from the baby--Daniel at the time--and make comments about how yucky babies were. But yesterday, there she was, asking me for a paper towel and tenderly wiping the yogurt off of Matthew's face. I know that her ability to appreciate the value of a little one was formed in part because of the value she has seen my children place on the little ones in their lives. As I started making stew for dinner, the girls and Daniel asked to help. Potatoes were peeled, and brownies were made, all by little hands eager to be busy and do their part. Was dinner put on the table by the usual time? No. When allowing little hands to help chores seem to get done a bit more slowly, but with beautiful music playing in the background, yummy smells of beef stew and chocolate in the air, and cooperative children, who minds an extra half hour added to the preparation time? I wish I could say these kinds of afternoons were the rule and not the exception. I know so much of it is determined by my own state of mind, my own level of peace. Did the cooperation of the children affect my peace, or did my peace affect the cooperation of the children? I believe it is the latter, in large degree. Choosing to welcome a little girl into my home, choosing to allow my little ones to work with me in the kitchen, choosing to create a warm, yummy smelling, beautiful sounding environment in my home. When my choices get lined up with God's heart...it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood.

A bowlegged cowgirl

I had no idea how real my fear of horses was until yesterday afternoon when I was driving down the road toward mine and Emma's first horseback riding lesson. My heart was pounding, my face was flushed and hot, and my head felt like it was going to explode. Of course, Emma showed absolutely no fear or nervousness whatsoever, it's like a dream come true for her. Wondering why I would subject myself to such anxiety? Believe me, I was asking the same question yesterday. But really, there are a few reasons. It's a good possibility Emma will have a horse when she gets to be 12 or 13, and I want to get over my nervousness and feel good about being around the animals before then. I also thought it would be good to conquer that fear, because fear is never a good thing. And, I think it's good to learn and experience things with our children. I learned a little Spanish with Andrew, I've become more familiar with the game of football with Jon, and now I am going to learn how to handle a horse with Emma. So we got there, and they showed us how to saddle the horses. Emma's horse was named Joy, mine was Dayo...mother and daughter horses, 32 and 28 years old! Very gentle and calm, in fact they were falling asleep during the lesson! You'd think that would relax me but I had to keep purposely relaxing my muscles because they were involuntarily clenching. They handed us the reins and let us lead the horses out to the arena. I was terrified that Dayo was going to step on me. And then it was time to get on...and all I could think was "I'm sorry, horse!" I'm not what you would call a lightweight, if you know what I mean...So there I was on a horse, and I must say that by the end I was actually enjoying myself. We put the horses away, and I brushed Dayo while Emma brushed Joy, and thus ended our first lesson. Emma was teary as we left, wishing we could come back more often. And, while I admit I was relieved when it was time to get off of the horse, I did have a good time and look forward to our next lesson.
FYI: you know that feeling you get after rollerskating for a while and then putting your regular shoes back on...like you are still skating? You have that feeling after an hour on a horse, too. My legs felt so funny..like a bow-legged cowgirl....

Steak for breakfast...

I came across a huge little verse this morning while I read my Bible.

"Let all that you do be done in love." 1 Corinthians 16:14

I know that my life would change dramatically if I could actually live that out. If every interaction, every chore, every action I take and word I speak was done in love there would be no room for selfishness, insecurity, anger or discouragement. You know, if you think about it, if God is love and He is holy and without sin, then if we do everything in love we are doing everything in God and it is impossible for God and sin to dwell in the same place....so could it be that the more I do in love the less sin will be working in my life? And, if God is love and I am to do everything I do in love, couldn't that be a key to knowing who I am in Christ? Since God is love and we are made in His image?

"God is love, and the one who abides in this love abides in God, and God abides in Him."

1 John 4:16

If I do all that I do in love, I am abiding in God, and He is abiding in me. And if God is abiding in me then sin cannot abide in me. And nothing is impossible because God can do all things....

Just chewing on some meat this morning. Anybody got a toothpick?

Book Meme

Jenn tagged me for a Book Meme, which I had never heard of before. I'm finally getting to it.....

From Pride and Prejudice, p 56

"..Mrs. Phillips protested that they would have a nice comfortable noisy game of lottery tickets, and a little bit of hot supper afterwards. The prospect of such delights was very cheering, and they parted in mutual good spirits. Mr. Collins repeated his apologies in quitting the room, and was assured with unwearying civility that they were perfectly needless. "

If you'd like to do a book meme, here are the instructions:

Grab the nearest book.

Open to page 56.

Find the fifth sentence.

Post the text of the next two to five sentences on your blog, along with these instructions.

Don't dig for the coolest book, or most intellectual book, or your favorite book--pick the closest book.

Tag five more people.

I'm not sure if I can come up with five more people other than who Jenn tagged. But Corrie, if you read this-tag, you're it! And Keila, too. And I retag Dee..and Beth.

Experimenting...

I have always been of the opinion that it's better in the long run when a child can own a good decision rather than be forced into it. For instance, there have been times when a young one of mine did not want to give someone else a turn with a toy. In those instances, I usually give my child a chance to do the right thing on their own, rather than force them to give away the toy. I do this because I think it will mean more and do more good for my child if they get to own that good feeling they get when they share with a willing and (mostly) cheerful heart. Being forced to share and take turns won't produce those happy feelings, and may even cultivate even more stinginess, in my opinion. So I will talk with the child, encourage the child to share or take turns, and most of the time they will make the right decision on their own, and feel good about it.

So, that being said, today I decided that there are times when it is ok to take the decision making out of their hands. You see, I want my children to learn to wake up with an attitude of, "How can I make this day great for others?" Rather than, "How can I make my day great for me?" Or even worse, "How can Mom make this day great for me?" I have been at a loss for how to try to make this happen until this morning's walk and prayer time. Here's my plan: I am going to establish 2 hours of every day as "not about me time" for each of the children. During this time they may not tell me how bored they are, or that there's nothing to do. They may not ask me to watch tv or play video games or to even play a game with them. They are responsible to do something for someone else--play with a younger sibling (and games that the younger sibling would like!), do an extra job for mom or dad, walk the dog (caring for our animals is Godly, says so in the Bible!), write a letter or make a picture for a far away loved one, etc. My hope is that as they get into the habit of intentionally putting others first, it will become part of the fabric of their being. It's an experiment, I admit. But it beats the alternative--encourage, lecture, nag--which isn't working, anyway.
Another experiment, with credit going to the Duggers (the family with 17! children): Today I paired up the kids as cleaning buddies, and gave each team 4 spaces to clean. In an hour the house and yard were looking picked up enough for me to relax in, and the kids did a great job working together. Since Daniel was busy cleaning, he wasn't fighting with Matthew, and since Jon was his cleaning buddy he wasn't fighting with Emma, either. If I did that once or twice a week, I could, perhaps, keep my sanity for a little while longer... And there was still plenty of time to get a full day of school in, a play date and a hike with loved ones to enjoy the beautiful October air and colors.

Oh, Happy Day

When she was 2 and 3, a happy birthday was a birthday cake. As in, we are eating some happy birthday. Now that she's 7, it's still all about the birthday cake. (That's my girl!) So, by request, I made a white cake with pink frosting, and some cupcakes just for fun! I'm so thankful for the splash of pink God sent to us on this day seven years ago. She brings out the girly side of this mom of 4 boys, and she's such a sweet helper with the littlest guy. Ken says she's the sweetest young lady he has ever knowed (yes, he knows that's bad grammar), but he enjoys the rolled eyes and smile it elicits from his girl. She's the sweetest of the sweet, and the coolest of the cool. Happy Birthday, Emma!
If you look very closely you can see that Emma now has her ears pierced!